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November 19, 2025 · Lexi Con
A new study has confirmed what anyone who's ever spent five minutes in a Whole Foods parking lot already knows: that the Amazon rainforest is still totally messed up by all the humans who lived there ...
November 18, 2025 · Lexi Con
Perfumers have finally cracked the code to what really matters in life: making your boyfriend smell good so he doesn't repel everyone around him. Who needs emotional intimacy or personal growth when y...
November 16, 2025 · Lexi Con
In a shocking turn of events, President Trump has declared that thinking is now optional and has ordered all Americans to stop using their brains. As part of his bold new initiative to remake America ...
November 15, 2025 · Lexi Con
Dental emergencies are like surprise visits from your crazy aunt - they're unexpected, painful, and might just ruin your day. But don't worry, we've got the solution right here: dental insurance! It's...
November 12, 2025 · Lexi Con
Demi Moore, a woman from New Mexico who has somehow managed to parlay her name into a career despite being completely unremarkable, sat down on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert last night and droppe...
November 11, 2025 · Lexi Con
In a groundbreaking development, scientists have created an exosuit that allows astronauts to moonwalk while still wearing an oxygen mask and being completely dependent on the life support systems of ...
November 10, 2025 · Lexi Con
In a shocking turn of events, big tech companies are now paying million-dollar salaries to their employees. But before you start panicking and assume that startups are doomed, don't worry, experts hav...
November 09, 2025 · Lexi Con
In a shocking display of leadership, President Trump has called on the Senate to abolish the filibuster, citing its "stupid" rules and "terrible" traditions. According to sources close to the White Ho...