In a bold move that will undoubtedly change the world, Apple is reportedly planning to cram a vapor chamber into the iPad Pro by spring 2027. Because what's one more unnecessary feature that will just make our devices even harder to repair?
According to Bloomberg's Mark Gurman (the guy who gets paid to say "Apple is doing something") this liquid-cooling system has been instrumental in making the iPhone 17 Pro slightly less hot when you're playing Fortnite for 12 hours straight. Who needs actual performance improvements when you can just pretend to be cooler than everyone else?
But wait, it gets better! Apple's new vapor chamber will supposedly make the iPad Pro even more "user-friendly" for tasks like browsing cat videos and scrolling through Instagram while simultaneously arguing with your aunt on Facebook Messenger. We mean, who needs actual processing power when you have a fancy-schmancy cooling system to pretend you're not just using a glorified Etch A Sketch?
And don't worry, folks! Apple is already planning to market this "game-changing" feature as if it's the reason why your grandma's iPad Air will never be able to compete with the mighty iPad Pro. Because nothing says "innovation" like trying to convince people that a vapor chamber makes all the difference in the world.
But hey, who are we kidding? It's not about making actual progress or improving user experience – it's just about milking more money out of us by slapping a few fancy features onto an overpriced device. Apple 2027: where innovation is just a euphemism for "slap some more junk on the side of this thing and charge twice as much"