In a shocking revelation that will send shockwaves through the scientific community and confirm what we've all been suspecting: woolly rhinoceroses were just too hip for this world. Researchers from the Centre for Palaeogenetics and Stockholm University (read: a team of genius scientists with far too much free time) have managed to extract the genome of one particularly stylish woolly rhino, and it turns out that these majestic creatures were basically just waiting for the right moment to drop their extinction like a hot new single.
According to sources close to the project (okay, it was probably some intern named Bertrand), the team spent years searching for the perfect specimen, and when they finally found one, it was stuck in the stomach of a wolf puppy, because, you know, that's just how the world works sometimes. The pup, incidentally, had been frozen solid since the Ice Age, but its contents had managed to stay fresh – much like our excitement for this news.
The researchers claim that their findings will provide valuable insights into the decline of the woolly rhino population prior to extinction. But let's be real: we all know what really caused their downfall – they just couldn't resist the urge to party in the frozen tundra, and eventually, they danced themselves right out of existence.
In related news, paleogeneticists are already working on sequencing the genomes of other extinct creatures, including the Disco-era Saber-toothed Tiger and the Funk-loving Mammoth. Because who wouldn't want to know what kind of dance moves a 10,000-year-old woolly rhino brought to the Ice Age club scene?