In a shocking turn of events, it has come to our attention that clicking "Subscribe" on the Ms. Pat Settles It show is now required to watch the actual episode. We're not sure what's more astonishing: the fact that BET figured out a way to monetize their own streaming service or that they thought we wouldn't notice.
According to sources, the subscription agreement has been conveniently reworded to include a clause that requires viewers to "acknowledge our Privacy Policy," which is actually just a long-winded explanation of how they plan on using your browsing history to create personalized ads for hemorrhoid cream. And if you think that's bad, the fine print also includes an ominous warning: "You understand that you can unsubscribe at any time...but only after we've mined all the data we need from your soul."
But wait, there's more! As part of their innovative new strategy, BET has partnered with a mysterious organization known only as "The Paramount Family of Companies" to bring you even more targeted ads. Because who needs comedy when you can have coupons for colonoscopies?
We spoke to Ms. Pat herself about the new subscription model and her response was characteristically blunt: "Listen, if you ain't got nothin' better to do than click a button, then sign on up and watch me make fun of some people's lives."